Domesticated Read online

  The lights blinked twice before dying completely. Happy that I lit the candles, they flickered, illuminating just enough light through the mirror behind us. “We should get out of the water,” Sam decided, seeing the lightening matching the thunder now.

  I didn’t want to get out. I loved hearing the wind, the rain, the thunder, and feeling safe in his arms. However, I didn’t argue. I mean, the man did just tell me his dad died in a storm.

  Sam and I cooked together, naked with candles lighting the room. He was standing half attention the entire time as we flirted, touched, kissed, and cut up vegetables. I was sure I could make a grilled chicken salad all on my own now. It was delicious, but I was hungry for something else, and I was going to scream soon if I didn’t get it.

  “I would offer you dry clothes, but I really don’t think my panties would look that good on you, and I kind of like you naked,” I teased, pulling down my bed. I was hoping he followed me upstairs. I wasn’t sure what his plans were. I wasn’t sure how I felt about him sleeping with me let alone how he felt about it.

  “This place truly is amazing,” he said, walking to the windowed wall. I crawled in to bed, longing for his touch, for him to do things I desired for so long. My clitoris began to swell and throb, thinking about all that he agreed to do, but wasn’t doing it. Why couldn’t he just do it already?

  Sam slid in next to me but didn’t lie down. He leaned against the white leather headboard and reached for my tablet. “Got any movies on here?”

  Bingo. I slid next to him and raised his arm for me. Opening my movies folder hidden under the tab called ‘poems’ I went to my go-to guy. This was perfect. Sam could watch André spank a girl and learn a thing or two from his abilities.

  “You’re joking. You watch this?” he asked when my poems came up with André and a new girl, Anastasia. I hadn’t watched this one yet, either. It was only uploaded the night before. I bought it and downloaded it that morning, not even thinking about Sam being in my bed when I returned.

  “Daily,” I answered truthfully.

  “You really are a dirty girl.”

  “That’s what I want from you, Sam. That’s what I want you to do,” I explained, watching André place the new girl over a desk and punish her for being a bad girl.

  “I don’t understand this, Kendra.”

  “It doesn’t matter. It’s what I am paying you to do. Will you do it?”

  “Right now?”

  I knew by the look in his eyes that I had him. He was hooked. I took the tablet from his hands and switched it off, moved the covers from his lap, and laid across his legs, demanding he spank me. My pussy was so wet and throbbing in anticipation of finally getting what I wanted.

  Sam placed his hand over my round ass and held it there. Just the feel of his hand did something to me. I couldn’t imagine what it was going to be like when he finally did it.

  “Kendra?”

  “Mouse,” I corrected. “Do it, Sam.”

  I audibly heard the sigh and then felt the air from his hand disappearing from my ass.

  Crack.

  Oh. Fuck. I was liberated. I was high. The sound and the feel of that first slap were intoxicating. I was addicted. I wanted more.

  “Is that what you want, Mouse?”

  “God, yes, please do it again. I’m sorry I was bad. Spank me more, Sam,” I begged, gasping for needed air. Every time his hand came down, I wanted more. I wanted it harder. I wanted to feel the handprints on my ass, the sting, and the humiliation behind it. I was sure I had never been so turned on in all my life. Sam was just as turned on. I could feel how turned on he was just below my hipbone.

  I don’t know where my audacity was coming from, but after thirteen cracks, and the constant stinging to my cheeks, I raised myself to my knees in front of him, spread my sore butt cheeks, and begged him to give it to me.

  “Please put it in my ass, Sam, please,” I whined like a child, begging for a Wal-Mart toy.

  “No, I’m not going to do that, Kendra. Not yet.”

  “You have to. I’m fucking paying you, goddammit. And don’t call me Kendra. I told you not to do that.” Damn. I was really pissed. I was yelling and blood pumped through my veins like a boiling fury.

  “You want to be fucked? You want me to treat you like some fucking slut I picked up off the street? Is that what you want?” Sam yelled right back, throwing me to my back. Okay, maybe he was madder than I was.

  My eyes rolled to the back of my head when he forced himself inside my pussy. Jesus. God. Garrison never felt like this. Grabbing a handful of hair, Sam possessively kissed me. I was sure I wasn’t being fucked by Sam. These kind of emotions didn’t coincide with fucking. He was making love. We were making love. Fuck. Shit. Damn. When did this happen? How did it get to this?

  The first wave ecstasy hit me like a freight train. I felt a tingling sensation first—the calm before the storm, sort of like that feeling you get when you’re about to yawn. You can feel it. You know it’s coming, and then bam. My clitoris felt like it was turning inside out, exposing sensitive nerve endings. When I get myself off, it’s just a body experience. A feel good, tingly sensation that takes over my body. It keeps me fulfilled, enough that I’m not frustrated.

  This was soooooo different from when I did it myself. It was as much of a body release as it was a mind release. My body completely tensed as Sam brought me to a pleasure so unreal it caused my mind to shut down. I couldn’t have cared less about the wicked storm outside the window, right above our head. I was completely out of control. I wasn’t expecting Sam to thrust into me like he did.

  His body relaxed right after he shot a load of hot come inside me. We probably should have discussed that part.

  Panting, trying to come back to reality, my hands fell to my sides. Sam raised his head just enough to look down at me. I hated that look. I was terrified of that look. “It wasn’t supposed to be like that,” I whispered to his lips.

  I could tell Sam was asleep by the sound of his deep breathing. I was more confused than I was when I was a little girl. I didn’t understand what was happening to me, why I felt like this laying in his arms. Was it Sam, was it me, or was it Garrison? Which one of us made it different? Could I have had this with someone other than Garrison? Was this the way it was for the normal class?

  The storm had settled and the night was now a quiet, peaceful, fucked up ball of confusion. I consciously felt my hand covered by Sam’s. Oh my god. What the hell was I doing? I slid from beneath his arm, and wrapped myself in a robe. Once I realized the power was on, I turned the dryer on for our wet clothes and walked to the kitchen.

  After pouring a glass of wine, I took it and walked out to the deck. Everything was wet, but I didn’t care. I dumped the water off a chair and sat down, instantly feeling the wet soak my ass. Of course, it reminded me of the ass beating I got and loved from Sam. I wondered how he felt about it. Did it turn him on as much as it did me? What if he wasn’t okay with it? It didn’t matter. I wasn’t paying him to be okay with it. I was paying him to do a job. I would fire anyone else that didn’t do what I told them. Sam was no different.

  Staring out to the now calm sea, I listened to the waves and sipped my wine. I couldn’t let this happen again. I had to stay true to myself. I vowed long ago never to long for affection, love, or admiration from anyone. It was a safer place to be. Stone-cold was much easier than a false reality. I tried so many times to be a good girl for Adriana. A four-year-old doesn’t know anything about the wrapped up reasons behind the disapproval.

  I didn’t know my beautiful, successful mother was one of those reasons. I didn’t understand why I wasn’t allowed to go to my daddy, sit on his lap, and help him work. After my mom left, Adriana didn’t let me go to his office anymore. It started out that he was too busy. That was before she snaked her way in from being my nanny who took care of me to being my stepmother who hated me.

  I don’t remember a lot about when she was my nanny. I remember her being there
, bathing me and stuff, but when my mom was home, she took care of me. I only remember one time that she was mean to me before my mom left. I think that was when I started being afraid of her. I wonder now if that wasn’t the first time she tried to seduce my dad.

  I came running into his office, excited to show my dad I could snap my fingers. He was sitting on his desk with his hands to the side, not touching her. Her arms were around his neck and she was kissing him the way my mommy did. I didn’t understand why she was doing that.

  Adriana turned and glared at me. My dad jumped up and came to me. He picked me up and carried me out. I showed him how I could snap my fingers and he praised me on what a big girl I was, insisting we go show Mommy. She was on the phone, working. She was always working.

  Adriana took me from my dad a few minutes later, explaining it was time for my bath. I went with her without a care in the world, snapping my fingers with both hands. Once we were in my private bathroom, she ran water while I made a noise with my hard sole shoes and the marble floor.

  She turned to me with a vengeance and tore my clothes off me like a mad woman. “You don’t ever come barging into your daddy’s office like that again. Do you understand me?” she yelled, holding me by my arms, squeezing so hard it hurt.

  I nodded my little head and looked at her with glassy eyes, not understanding why she was so mad at me.

  “You don’t cry. If I see one tear slide down your ugly little face, I am going to spank you. You don’t cry!” she repeated through gritted teeth.

  I couldn’t help it. I was scared and four. Nobody ever talked to me that way and I didn’t want her to be my nanny anymore. I didn’t care if she was new. I didn’t want her. I felt the warm tear slide down my face, and then I don’t know what the hell happened. The next thing I knew, Adriana was sitting on the toilet, and I was bent over her lap with my panties over my butt.

  Adriana was the first and only person to ever hit me. She spanked me seven times before jerking me to my feet in fear of someone hearing me cry. Grabbing my face, she squeezed and told me to shut up before I got more. The next phase in my lesson was being thrown into the tub. I gasped from the cold water, trying to stand and get out. Adriana held me in and bathed me. I sucked in air every time the cup of ice-cold water was dumped over my head.

  I didn’t hate her anymore after she tucked me into bed. She was nice Adriana again. She told me she was sorry that she had to punish me like that and she never wanted to do it again, but she would if she had to. I wasn’t to bother my dad anymore when his office door was shut. She cuddled me, kissed my head, and read to me before tucking me in for the night.

  Expectedly, my four-year-old mind forgot that rule the very next day when the mailman delivered a big package. I ran to my mom’s office first with the surprise. It was something special, I just knew it, maybe it was the magic trick set I asked for that morning at breakfast.

  “Where’s my mommy?” I asked the cook. She informed me that she was out and I ran to my dad. Adriana was between his legs again, but this time he was behind his desk, sitting in his chair and she was on her knees.

  “What are you doing, Daddy?” I asked, puzzled. His closed eyes opened, his hands fell quickly from the back of his head, and he sat up straight, pulling Adriana to her feet.

  “I thought you locked the door?” he yelled at her. “Get out. I’ve got work to do,” he yelled.

  “Here’s a present for you. Can I see?” I asked. I just wanted to see what was in the box. I never did find out. Adriana jerked it from my arms and tossed it to his desk, dragging me by the arm out of my dad’s office. I knew I was in for it. Shoot. I forgot not to go in there when the door was shut.

  Adriana whipped me again, only this time, my mom wasn’t home to hear me cry. She didn’t care if I cried. She spanked me over and over, and then slapped me across the face after jerking me to my feet.

  “Are you okay?” Sam asked from the door, startling me. I didn’t even hear it slide open.

  “Yes, I’m fine. I couldn’t sleep,” I said, straightening my posture and wiping away tears I hadn’t even realized were falling.

  “Are you crying, Kendra?”

  “No, leave me alone. You can go.”

  “Go where?”

  “I don’t really care, Sam. I don’t need you anymore tonight. Thanks for taking care of business. Maybe we’ll hook up again in a day or two. I’ll call you.”

  “Kendra?” Sam questioned, kneeling in front of me. He didn’t understand what was happening. I didn’t understand what was happening. I just knew I couldn’t be doing this stupid shit. It was ridiculous. I needed to get back to being me.

  “Just go, will you?”

  “Is that really what you want?”

  “Yes,” I said, reverting my eyes from his to the ocean.

  “What happened?” Sam tried questioning again. I jerked my arm away from his touch.

  Standing, I coolly told him to leave again. “Your clothes should be dry now,” I said, walking away. I didn’t care how sexy he looked holding my white sheet around his waist, or how I loved his messy hair in the moonlight. I walked away.

  I lay in bed and turned to my stomach, searching the deep, dark sea for something, something that would make all this stop. Something that could make me feel better. I moved my fingers between my legs and remembered what that was. I played with myself, letting everything else disappear except for the feelings between my legs. That sensational feeling stopped it all. The thoughts vanished with the feelings between my legs and I fell asleep content.

  “Why are you still sleeping?”

  I groaned and rolled over.

  “Kendra? Wake up. Why are you still in bed? Didn’t you get my voicemail last night? Kendra?”

  My eyes popped open, realizing it was Garrison. Shit. Thank god, I sent Sam packing last night. This could have been bad. Garrison covered my naked breasts with the covers. “Why are you naked? Did you forget clothes?”

  Nice to see you, too… “What are you doing here? What time is it?”

  “If you checked your voicemail once in a while you would know. It’s Friday. I told you I was going to try to come.”

  “There was a bad storm last night. We lost power and my phone died,” I lied, coming up with it that second.

  “We?”

  Shit.

  “We, yes, as in our house. We lost power.” God I hoped that made sense.

  “Oh, well can you put some clothes on? I would like to go get breakfast and take the yacht out today.”

  “I can make us breakfast,” I offered. I could make eggs and toast. I could even make the coffee. I moved the covers, trying to be bold, show my husband my body, wanting him to want me. He turned away and even went as far as covering his eyes with his fingers. Garrison didn’t want to see me.

  “Since when do you know how to make breakfast?”

  “I can make eggs.”

  “Yeah, that’s a negative. Get ready. My wife doesn’t belong in a kitchen. Do you have the number for that charter place you’ve been using?”

  “Don’t you want to drive the boat yourself? We’ll take a picnic and eat up on the top deck.”

  “I can’t. I have too much work. I would rather have a driver.”

  “Yeah, I’ll call them,” I said, trying to get him to hear the disappointment in my tone. He didn’t hear anything but his ringing phone.

  “Ashby,” he said, answering and leaving me alone.

  “Missed you, too,” I called to the empty room, listening to Garrison talk about work as he descended the stairs.

  Shoot. I had to call Sam.

  “Hey, are you on my boat?” I asked, trying to make things not awkward.

  “No. I’m at my cabin. Why would I be on your boat?” Okay, he was going to make it awkward.

  “Garrison just showed up here. He wants to take the yacht out. Can you drive?”

  “Doesn’t he know how?”

  “Yes, Sam. He needs to work.”

  �
��Then what’s the point? He should stay home and work.”

  “If you don’t want to then just say so. I’ll call the marina and get someone else.”

  “Kendra, you want me to sit behind the wheel and watch you hang all over your husband all day? I don’t think I can do that. You better call Fat Matt.”

  “I assure you, there will be no hanging all over my husband. I need a yes or a no, Sam.”

  “Whatever. What time?”

  “Meet us there at ten,” I said, looking at the clock. Two hours should do it.

  Garrison wouldn’t walk to The Strip for breakfast. We had to take my car because he only had dress shoes. It wasn’t even nine yet and it was hot. My traditional sundress didn’t help matters. Unlike the one from the day before, it hung just below my knees, and I was ready to rid the three quarter length shawl that covered my shoulders and arms. It was easier than listening to Garrison tell me how it wasn’t proper.

  You would’ve thought he’d ask me about my made up doctor’s appointment over breakfast, but he didn’t. He spoke on the phone, wanting someone to email him the unit sales from the first quarter of last year before we set out, knowing he wouldn’t have any technology once we were away from shore.

  “We don’t have to go out on the yacht if you don’t want to. I know you need your internet and phone to work,” I tried, wanting out of it. All I could think about was Sam, and how unprofessional he was. God. I hoped he didn’t say something stupid.

  “No, it’s fine. That’s why I want to go. I need to get some paperwork done. I’m hoping without the constant ringing of my phone and email notifications I can get some work done. You ready?” he asked, pushing his plate away.

  “Yes,” I drearily replied. UGH. I did not want to do this.

  Sam smirked at me as I walked behind Garrison, who was still on the phone. Sam took his computer bag for him and he walked past him, right to the front of the deck without so much as a hello. I don’t know why that irritated me. It’s what we did. We didn’t talk to people like Sam, but for some reason, it pissed me off that he thought he was better than Sam.

  “Mrs. Ashby,” Sam properly spoke, reaching for my hand. I took it and locked my gaze with his.